"A newt? ...I got bettah."

Yesterday didn't start out well, in fact, it sucked. I awoke at about 7:50 — 10 minutes before I am suppose to be at work. Normally this isn't a problem, its not far to work and the folks there are pretty relaxed about things. However, this morning was also cleaning checks. Cleaning checks aren't much different in a college apartment then they are at home. You get a list of jobs that need to be done, divided amongst the siblings (roommates). At the appointed time "mom" (always a women, but the age of the cleaning inspector varies) comes by and depending on her mood either breezes through and tells you things look great, points out one or two areas that need to be touched up and tells you she'll be back the next day, or yells and screams about what ungrateful and lazy children you are, curses the world for being born a woman, shoots projectile vomit and her head starts to spin. Oh and they charge you $30.

So I start to clean in a mad rush, and because Ty left the day before, I am now the sole resident of Jamestown 38, and therefore the sole cleaner of Jamestown 38. And in a rushed state like this you know what would be great? An on-set of my reoccuring loose stool! (gross I know, but imagine when it hits you and you didn't even realize it, double gross) So guess its time for a shower. And since it's Shave-Day (I only must every other day) I grab my razor to shave in the shower. And then I gash my cheek. Not that big of a cut really, but it proceeded to bleed for 20 minutes. Not an oops-I-pricked-my-finger drip, but a hook-up-a-tube-and-make-a-donation-to-Red-Cross gush.

So I get dressed and after some sweeping, mopping, and wiping-down, I finish the vacuuming of my bedroom. Well we have had two vacuums (both not used) for some time, and now I know why. One has a pen stuck in it. If it just rattled loudly that would be one thing. But it also has ink on the brush, and therefore leaves brush strokes of ink on my carpet. Maybe those were already there? I get in the car and try to sneeze and cough at the same time, resulting in the most painful body contraction, my windshield gets sprayed and somehow I wack my head on the window. That's when I lost it and just started laughing. I had lost all grip on the world and now I was loosing my grip on sanity.

And in the swirl of it all, between trying to watch the Last Samurai at 1 am and my morning excitement I forgot to read my scriptures. So I took my lunch at like 12:30 and came home to eat and read. I actually tried something my mom suggested. When you have a problem or something you trying to work out or get help with, you pray and tell the Lord exactly what's going on and what you need. Then you open the scriptures and read. Yeah, so I was a bit skeptical when I started. But I ended up with one of the most incredible and special experiences of my life. So special and personal in fact, I am just going to leave it at that. Needless to say I felt better.

Until I got to work. And then I proceeded to have one of the most intense headaches. I would stare at my screen and my head would throb worse each time I moved across the screen. After almost two hours of minimal production and maximum endurance, I threw in the towel and told my boss I was out like the Lakers in the Finals. I went home and crashed face first into my couch for 2 straight hours. Only to be awoken and slightly mocked by Ryan from across the hall. I actually was feeling better...again.

I went to institute with Mindy again. We were talking about Enoch and "Zion" when we got on the topic of selfishness and serving others. Sad that so many couples, friends, and families get broken up and hurt because of selfishness. Brother Ainge (not Danny) challenged us to look for at least one opportunity to serve or do something nice on behalf of someone each day for the next week. I try my best, but why does it take some sort of homework assignment for me to actually focus on being charitable? But its true, if you serve someone and forget about yourself, things get better. Just think of the difference between Elder McKinnon and Elder Tang.

Drum roll please (ummm...sound of drum rolling) — I went grocery shopping. Yeah I wanted some apples and Mindy needed some things so we went to Wal-Mart. Let me just say, I love Wal-Mart. Wal-Mart is like a small self-sufficient metropolis that never sleeps. I sometimes dream about setting up a small ranch and living out the rest of my days on the prarie just west of electronics and north of home furnishings. Maybe it's just me, but I hate grocery shopping (I feel like I am eating my money) but its a sort of neccessary task in order to live, unless of course I go with a girl and then becomes yet another fun thing to do together? Well, I guess it's not that surprising, isn't that what we're all looking for, or trying to hold on to? Someone who makes normal things fun, fun things exciting, and makes you a better person?

I know I am.